Naruto in Wonderland
by g0o0gle3y3s
Summary: Basically what the title says... Disclaimer: Don't own either Naruto or Alice in Wonderland. If you rate & review, please no flames...that's just rude...I don't mind suggestions for a better writing though. Thanks! Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Naruto characters or Alice in Wonderland. They rightfully belongs to Disney Corp. and Kishimoto Masashi.**

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**Italics: **Character's thoughts

**Alice:** Naruto

**White Rabbit:** Jiraiya

**Age:** 13 years old; after Sasuke goes to Orochimaru

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**Chapter 1**

Naruto woke up to the birds chirping loudly on a Sunday morning. He got out of bed and went into the restroom to freshen up. He lazily brushed his teeth; back and forth, back and forth. After he was done, he went into the kitchen to search for food. He was starving like a mad man and since it was around 11:30, he decided to go get some brunch. It was a sunny afternoon in the village of Konoha. As lunchtime rolled around, Naruto headed for Ichiraku Ramen to chow down his most favorite food in the world. Naruto strutted down the streets of the village until he came to the restaurant entrance. As he entered, he noticed someone already sitting there eating ramen. It turned out to be Chouji. Chouji turned around to see Naruto looking at him.

"Hey Naruto, wanna join me for some ramen?" asked Chouji.

"You bet!" answered Naruto.

Naruto took a seat next to Chouji and ordered two bowls of ramen. As he waited for his ramen to be cooked, he began staring off into space, thinking of only God knows what. "Here you go", said Teuchi (the old man behind the counter). Naruto, smiling happily, dug into his bowl of ramen and started chowing down. After about two minutes, Naruto finished his ramen, paid the old man, and said goodbye to Chouji.

"_Now I can start training again to get stronger so I can become Hokage!" _thought Naruto tightening his forehead protector.

Naruto headed for the training grounds where he goes everyday when he gets time. He started training around one o' clock. "Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!!" yelled Naruto. Now that Naruto had gotten some training partners, he started fighting himself.

About half an hour passed; he started getting tired so Naruto decided to take a break from his training. He was already starting to become hungry again from all the massive strength and energy he's been using. As Naruto lied there, he stared up into the sky to see a cloud shaped like Sasuke! Naruto stared at the cloud-shaped Sasuke for about a minute. Then it hit him that the cloud looks extremely similar to Sasuke's face. Naruto thought he was hallucinating, so he sat up, rubbed his eyes, looked back at the clouds again only to find that the cloud-shaped Sasuke had disappeared. _"Must've been my imagination."_

He was about to lie back down when he noticed from the corner of his eyes a white rabbit running by. The small white rabbit had Jiraiya sandals on with a pocket watch in its hand. It had Jiraiya-like hair, white and spiky and long. The weirdest thing though, that Naruto noticed, was that the only thing that the white rabbit was wearing was a pink boxers with red hearts and flowers.

Naruto stared at the rabbit in disbelief and rubbed his eyes. The rabbit was still there. _"How odd…"_ he thought. He was so astonished by the figure that he decided to follow this rabbit to see where it went; all the time while the white rabbit kept yelling: "I'm late! I'm late! Oh, dear God! I'm late!" Naruto yelled after the rabbit, telling him to wait, and asking him what he was late for, but the rabbit just kept hopping forward, saying he was late. Naruto followed the white Jiraiya rabbit into the woodland area when he noticed that the white rabbit had entered into a small hole on the side of a giant oak tree. Naruto stared, wide-eye, blinking as if he was dumbfounded. Naruto got on all fours and looked into the hole on the side of the tree.

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**-Looking into the dark hole, what wonders awaits our Naruto ahead?**

**Translation for the Japanese words:**

**-Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu: Mass Shadow Clone Technique**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hope you guys like it so far...I'm REALLY bad at being creative ahaha and writing stories haha so yea...**

**Don't own Homer in this.**

**Enjoy! **

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**Talking Door:** Shikamaru

**LittleKuriboh's line:** "super, special, awesome, ultra" (or something like that)

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**Chapter 2**

As Naruto stared into the hole, he thought to himself: _"I'm gonna follow that white rabbit and see where it's heading." _Naruto started to enter the hole, but as he was trying to get in, he couldn't stuff his head in. The hole, apparently, was too small for the gigantic Naruto to go through. Naruto thought maybe he should blow it up with some explosive tags, but thought maybe it would be better not to do anything rash, since he didn't want to ruin his chance of finding out what the rabbit was up to. So Naruto started digging to make the hole bigger so that his entire body can get through. Once in a while, Naruto would get help from a white rabbit, which Naruto fails to notice IS the white Jiraiya rabbit.

"Thanks for helping me!" Naruto said to the rabbit.

"Haha, no problem, kid!" the rabbit snickered.

Once they were done, the rabbit jumped back into the hole leaving Naruto in a stupefied state.

"GRR!!! That stupid rabbit! Why the hell didn't I notice that it was that stupid, lame rabbit I was chasing the whole time!! Alright, I'm going in! I'm gonna find out what you're up to if it's the last thing I do." said Naruto, talking to himself.

Naruto looked as if he was about to explode any minute, clenching his fists. He jumped into the now giant hole. Once in, all Naruto could see was darkness. The darkness surrounded him until he saw a small glowing light a few feet to his right. Naruto looked closer to find that it was a lamp not plugged into any electrical outlet. Since it was so dark, he twisted the knob on the lamp and to his surprise it turned the light on. To his amazement, Naruto saw a lot of weird and strange things surrounding him. Every object was floating in midair as if it was done by magic. He looked around and saw a bunch of things he couldn't make out. One thing he saw that caught his attention was a portrait of a woman who looked almost identical to Sakura. Naruto floated closer to the picture and stared at it. After about three seconds, the eyes of the woman in the portrait moved, scaring the shit out of Naruto. Since he was afraid of ghosts, Naruto screamed like a little girl and jerked back to find the portrait back to normal and nothing else happened further more. He came to the conclusion that it was only his imagination.

Naruto saw clams flying by with wings, though he didn't know why they had wings when they were floating. He moved his head a little and noticed that the woman he saw earlier in the portrait had vanished; leaving a picture of what he thought to be Itachi, staring at him with his cold, expressionless face, but it wasn't Itachi. The portrait turned out to be Homer Simpson munching away on his ribwich sandwich.

_"Who's that?"_ thought Naruto; eyebrow raised.

Naruto turned to his left to find a lion-like stuffed animal grabbing and caressing onto what seems to be a big pair of boobies (For those of you who don't know, this is Kon from Bleach). As Naruto was about to say something, since it seemed weird for a stuffed animal to be moving, he rapidly fell through a narrow opening, leading him to land on his butt on the other end of the weird world.

"Ow! What the fuck?!?!" yelled Naruto, cussing to thin air.

The room he fell into was like a hallway to a royal bedchamber of some royal person. The floor was checkered-like, with black and white squares. Just then, Naruto caught the rabbit running through the door in front of him. "Wait!!!" yelled Naruto. But the rabbit ignored him and ran off. He followed the rabbit into a different room and saw loads of portraits of the rabbits' family hanging on the wall. Each one looking more weird than the last. There was mama white Jiraiya rabbit and papa white Jiraiya rabbit and brothers and sisters and grandpas and grandmas and uncles and aunts. As he looked around in wonder, the rabbit ran through a small door on the wall and shut the door, leaving a loud bang to snap Naruto out of his daydreaming. Naruto turned to see curtains covering the door. He ran towards the door, opened the curtain, opened the door and was about to flung himself through it when he hit his face against another, smaller door.

"Argh! What the hell?!?! Stupid doors!" yelled Naruto.

He opened the second door, and there appeared another one. After going through about five doors, Naruto found the opening to the next room. Naruto crawled through the super, special, awesome, ultra, extremely, tiny door. To his amazement, he was able to fit through the door. As Naruto got half his body through the door, he saw the rabbit on the other side of the room, going through another door, closing the curtains behind him. "Not so fast!!!" yelled Naruto. Naruto struggled to get through. As he was about to get through, his butt gets stuck in the super, special, awesome, ultra, extremely, tiny door. Now half of Naruto's body was on the other side of the door while the other side was stuck behind. Naruto struggled and struggled, trying to squeeze his huge butt through the super, special, awesome, ultra, extremely, tiny door. Naruto used all his might and eventually broke through the door. He got through the super, special, awesome, ultra, extremely, tiny door, but couldn't help but noticed that the door was now stuck around his hips.

He broke the ring of wood around his hips, ran towards the other door and opened the curtain. He was about to open the door when he saw that the door looked completely like…Shikamaru (with no body). The door had Shikamaru's pineapple hair sticking out. The same Shikamaru boring expression on the face of the door. _"Is that Shikamaru?"_ thought Naruto. But Naruto didn't care and tried turning the doorknob to hear a voice saying 'ouch!' Naruto let go of the doorknob and looked at it in astonishment. The door then opened its eyes and started talking.

"May I help you?" said the Shikamaru door.

"Uh…I was following a white rabbit and I saw him run through you! Now open up so I can go find out what he's up to!" said Naruto.

"Mendokuse! I'd like to help you kid, but too bad for you, I'm locked. And besides you are much too big to go through." said the door.

"Then what the hell am I supposed to do! I have to get through. That rabbit must be plotting something stupid!" Naruto yelled back.

Just then a table and a small bottle appeared in the room.

"You must drink that so that you can grow smaller to get through me" said the door.

"Screw that! That'll just waste my time! I'll just bust you down right now!" screamed the blonde.

Naruto punched the door as hard as he could but nothing happened. Naruto thought it was weird, why didn't the door break down like he though it would.

"Haha, you can't break me down, I'm far too sturdy for you to break down. Your only hope is to drink the liquid in the bottle and go through. If you keep wasting time, you won't be able to catch up to the white rabbit." mocked the door.

Naruto growled at the stupid Shikamaru door and picked up the bottle that contained the mysterious liquid he had to drink. Naruto drank the mysterious liquid and thought to himself: _"Hmm…this tastes good."_ Suddenly Naruto started to feel a weird, queasy sensation in his stomach and groaned. The room around him started to grow bigger and bigger and wider and wider. Naruto thought he was imagining things but he realized that it was himself that had shrunk.

"Ahhhhh!!!! What the hell happened to me!??!?" screamed Naruto.

"You just drank the liquid that allows you to change the size of yourself."

"But look; now I can get through you! Hahha!"

Naruto walked up to the Shikamaru door. As he walked closer, something seemed a little strange to him. He thought that he would be the right size to fit through the door, but he was at least half the size of the door. Naruto looked up at the face of the door and went: "Hhhaaaa?????" bulging out his white eyes.

"What the hell!??!? How the hell am I supposed to get through now!!?!?! Grr…I'm just gonna break you down. I don't care how long it takes, I'm gonna go through you stupid door."

"Whoa, wait, hold up. I already said that I'm unbreakable and besides you forgot the keys on the table to unlock me." laughed Shikamaru door.

Now Naruto was furious, about to go psycho on his ass. Then a smirk came upon his face as he looked at the door evilly.

"Whoa, hey, what are you going to do to me?" asked the door.

"You'll see" snickered Naruto.

Naruto walked up to the talking door. The door looked at him with fear, but couldn't do anything since he was stuck there. Naruto grabbed a hold of the door's mouth and yanked open his mouth, exposing what was on the other side of the door. As Naruto was widening the keyhole even more, the door starting yelling at him.

"Oi! Stop it! That fucking hurts, man!"

Naruto ignored the screaming door and went on with what he was doing. He widened the door's keyhole and ushered himself through it. He shoved half his body through the keyhole to the other side and entered through to whatever was on the other side. Naruto landed on hard ground and stared into the giant forest.

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**-What will Naruto discover next as he continues on into wonderland?**

**Translation for the Japanese words:**

**-Mendokuse: How troublesome or troublesome.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Tweedle Dee & Tweedle Dum:** Rock Lee & Gai

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**Chapter 3**

Naruto looked straight into the forest full of trees. He sees a light at the other end which appears to be the opening. He ran towards the opening. As he exits into the open, he found that he was at the ocean's shore, with a bunch of sea animals running around a weird looking dodo trying to dry himself with a small lit fire. Naruto gazed at them for a while and then thought to himself: _"I don't time for this, gotta find that rabbit."_ Naruto ran into the forest again on his right. He thought maybe the rabbit was hiding from him, since rabbits lives in holes in the ground, Naruto decided to check every hole around. He looked through holes in the trees; he looked through holes in the ground; heck, he even crawled through a log on the floor. When Naruto came out the other end of the log; he felt a presence standing behind him. He quickly turned around to see two twin matching couple wearing green tights.

"Fuzzy Brows! Super Fuzzy Brows!" yelled Naruto.

But the two twin green couple stared at him as if he was speaking in tongues.

"I don't know what you're talking about, kid, but I'm Tweedle Gai! And this is my cute twin friend, Tweedle Lee! And you are??" said the taller of the two.

Naruto looked on in complete confusion and then said: "Well, whatever, I'm Naruto. Now get of my way so I can find out where that stupid rabbit went!"

"Wait, wait!" said the shorter one. "Why don't you come train with us? We're training to become stronger for the springtime of youth is upon us!!"

"Ehh…I'll pass."

"Aww, come on. Just one round??" begged Tweedle Lee with puppy dog eyes. "Why do you want to follow the rabbit anyways?"

"I'm curious to see what he's up to. I think he's plotting something strange, but I don't know what. That is why I'm going to find out!"

Tweedle Gai and Tweedle Lee stared at Naruto in amazement and then started talking to each other.

"You know, the great Yellow Flash was also curious, curious about the forbidden technique which was not to be used by anyone."

"Oh, I know, and do you remember what happened to him?"

Both Tweedles sighed and said at the same time: "Poor thing!"

"Why, what happened to this Yellow Flash dude?" asked Naruto.

"Oh, no, it's nothing. You don't want to know anyways. You're in much, too much of a hurry." said the Tweedles in unison.

"Well…" hesitated Naruto. He thought for a moment and said: "I guess I could stay for a while, and besides I wanna hear what happened to this dude and what he did."

"You do?!!?" asked Tweedle Lee "Oh! I'm so excited!"

They sat Naruto down on the log as they started their story about what happened to the Yellow Flash during his time of reign. Naruto listened with interest.

Tweedle Lee:

"Now the Yellow Flash lived a happy life in his little home town of Echizen by the sea.

Everyday was a life of luxury as he played with his Nintendo wii.

Wandering the streets of his home town.

He found an extra, super, awesome, ultra, large, huge paw imprinted in the ground.

He gazed at it and tried to figure out.

Apparently, he had heard, and without a doubt."

Tweedle Gai:

"It must've been the most dangerous creature of all the land.

He concluded that he will wipe out this creature with his own bare hand.

Without knowing he was walking right into the most dangerous task yet.

But remembered the most forbidden technique, the bet.

Traded his life to seal the creature with 100 percent life force, zero.

Went down in history known as the town's one and only hero."

"THE END" said both Tweedles together.

"That was a sad story. I can't believe he was killed just by using that jutsu!" said Naruto.

"Well…yeah, that's what happened." said Tweedle Lee.

"Well…it's been fun, but I gotta go!"

As Naruto tried to get away, they both grabbed him. Each one grabbed one of his arms. They sat Naruto down on the same log again and started on a new story. As they were telling away, getting carried away, Naruto slipped away from them and ran deeper into the forest. The next thing Naruto sees is a huge pink house with red hearts and flowers all over it.

_"I wonder who lives here"_ thought Naruto.

And as he approached closer, he sees someone running out. Turned out to be none other than…

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**-What will Naruto uncover in this pink-ass girly house?**

**Echizen is an actual town probably in the old days. I don't know if it still exists today. Of course, I made up the story/poem a little. I didn't want to put that he lived in Konoha. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Liking it?**

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**Dodo:** As himself

**Bill the Lizard:** As himself

**Michiru:** Made up character/name

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**Chapter 4**

Naruto stared as the white Jiraiya rabbit came running out screaming the name Michiru. Naruto's face lightened up knowing that he found the stupid white rabbit at last. Naruto ran up to the rabbit and was about to ask a question when the rabbit said:

"Michiru! Where have you been?"

"Michiru!?! I'm not a girl, you idiot!!"

"Go get my pair of boxers! NOW!!!"

The rabbit blew a trumpet in Naruto's face to get him going. He shoved Naruto into the very girly house. Once inside, Naruto looked and wondered where the hell he was going to find a pair of boxers for the stupid, dumb rabbit. After looking around for a while, Naruto decided to look upstairs. Naruto went up the girly stairs in a girly old-fashioned way. When he got to the top of stairs, he went in through a very girly door. Inside was a room; Naruto assumed it belonged to the rabbit. He started digging through everything that can contain clothing. He went through the drawers and the closets and then to the trunk. He couldn't seem to find the stupid boxers. He then noticed that on top of the drawers, there sits a small box of what seems to be some sort of candy shaped as a naruto. He was starving since he entered this stupid world that he decided to grab one and munch on it while he searched the room. As he munched on the naruto, he realized something felt weird. All of sudden, he starting growing out of control.

Outside, the rabbit waited. He was starting to get impatient.

"What is taking so long?" the rabbit said as he tapped his big, long feet.

The white Jiraiya rabbit walked towards his girly house; opened the front door to find a giant foot flying down the stairs, hitting him back out the girly house. Jiraiya rabbit screamed; blowing his trumpet and ran off his property to find help to get rid of the giant monster now occupying his beautiful girly home.

Inside the house, Naruto couldn't move an inch. He was trying to pull the house out of the ground so that he can get out. The stupid house, on the other hand, wouldn't budge; it was stuck like crazy onto the ground as if someone had super glued it. Out of the blue, he hears the rabbit talking to someone who he didn't recognize. He opened the pair of shutters on the window in front of him and looked out. It turned out to be that psycho Dodo. Both Dodo and the Jiraiya rabbit walked towards the house. Dodo was astonished to find something so big and wonderful and magnificent while the Jiraiya rabbit was ushering him to hurry up since he was running late. As the two tried to figure out what to do, they heard whistling coming closer. It was Bill the Lizard. Jiraiya rabbit ran towards the mangy lizard and grabbed him.

"Bill, help us!"

"No problem, anything."

Dodo grabbed the lad and drew him closer to the house.

"Now, Bill, go in through the chimney and pull out that monster, will ya?"

"Sure thing, Sir."

Bill started up the stairs, after a few seconds of his brain processing, he realized that they asked him to go retrieve a monster. Bill was now freaked out and wanted out. He climbed back down the ladder and tried to run away. Dodo caught his tail and moved him back up the ladder.

"Don't worry. It's just a monster. Besides you can become a major hero in the city. You can become famous and get all the girl lizards you want." Dodo said trying to calm him.

"I can?" asked the curious lizard.

"Of course, now don't forget. Go in, grab it, and pull it out."

"But…but…"

Before Bill could say another word, Dodo pushed him down the chimney. Bill fell in, and all the soot in the fireplace fluttered all over the room, filling the room with black dust. Naruto couldn't help it but he started getting a very itchy, uncomfortable feeling in his nose. He couldn't hold it back no more, so Naruto sneezed a sneeze that was so loud and hard that he blew Bill back up the chimney and blew the roof off the house.

"Whew, some fresh air now…" said Naruto.

"Well, there goes Bill" said the Dodo looking up at the sky.

"What are we going to do about my house, Dodo?" asked the rabbit. "Hurry, I must go soon!"

"Hmm…how about we burn the house down?"

"Of course, that sounds good…wait! Burn the house down?? NO! that's my house!"

_"What! I gotta get outta here or I'm going to be fried chicken!"_ thought Naruto.

Dodo started the operation for burning down the house. He looked for straws and woods and anything that would make a fire spread. At the same time, the white Jiraiya rabbit was freaking out. Naruto knew this was serious, so he looked around for something to eat. Maybe that would make him smaller. He looked around to find a small garden full of broccoli. The one thing Naruto hates most other than ghosts is vegetables, especially broccoli. But he had no choice, if he was to get out of the house before they start burning, he's gonna have to gulp it down. Naruto grabbed one of the broccolis, but the rabbit wouldn't let him. They tug-a-warred for a while and Naruto let go, sending the rabbit to fly backwards. It was wasting his time, so he grabbed another one and ate that one instead. Once he ate it, his body shrunk and he grew smaller than usual.

"Argh! That tasted like hell! I'm never eating that again!" said Naruto.

White Jiraiya rabbit looked at his pocket watch and realized that time was running out, he had to leave immediately. Naruto, who was still in the house, started heading for the room door. He crawled under the crack and started down the stairs. Three minutes later, Naruto came out of the front door only to see Dodo asking him if he had a lighter or a match. Naruto ignored him and ran off. Off in the distance, he saw the rabbit jumping away.

"Wait! Wait!" Naruto yelled after the rabbit, but the rabbit disappeared. "Grr, I'm never gonna catch him this small!"

Naruto wandered into a field full of flowers. He saw bread-like butterflies flying his way and landed on a leaf. Naruto looked at them drooling, just when he was about to grab one to eat, he heard a voice.

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**-Who could this voice be, and is it a friend or a foe, or just some weird person like everyone else Naruto had met so far?**


	5. Chapter 5

**ENJOY!! ...remember, if you R&R, no flames please...that's just rude, but you can always leave me feedback on what I can improve on! Thanks!**

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**Caterpillar:** Shino

**Talking Rose & Flowers:** Sakura, Ino, Tenten, Temari, Tsunade, Shizune, Kurenai, Anko & other girls

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**Chapter 5**

Naruto stopped in his tracks to hear the most beautiful voice ever. He turned around to see…no one. He thought it was weird and that maybe the flowers were talking to him. _"Nah! Flowers can't talk"_ thought Naruto. Out of nowhere, the rose in front of him started talking to him. Apparently, the rose looked like Sakura that Naruto was about to call out to her, but then he remembered the incident that happened with Fuzzy Brows and Super Fuzzy Brows, so he kept his mouth shut.

"Why, what's the matter dear?" asked the Sakura-like rose.

"Umm…Nothing. It's just that I've never seen a talking flower before.

"Well it's not like there's anything to talk about anyways" said another white lily flower that looked like Ino.

"Or who to talk about" said a fox-glove flower that looked like Temari, giggling.

"So then what the hell do you guys do all day?" asked Naruto.

"Well, most of the day we just sit here, or sleep." said a Tenten-like daisy flower.

"We sing too." said the Sakura rose.

"Really??" asked the now amazed Naruto.

"Oh would you like to hear the "Golden Petals?" asked a Tsunade dandelion.

"Or would you like to hear the "Daisy's Day?" asked a Kurenai sunflower.

"Umm---" said Naruto who was then cut off.

"Oh, what about "The Ringing Tulips?" asked a Shizune tulip.

"Or would you prefer "A Flower's Day?" asked an Anko chrysanthemum flower.

"Girls, girls! We shall sing "The Golden Afternoon" said the Sakura rose. "That one is about all of us."

All the flowers giggled and ohh-ed. Naruto sat down on the floor to listen to the song of the flowers that they were going to sing for him. The Sakura rose signaled for the vocalists to start. The song started.

Kurenai sunflower: "Laaaa…"

Shizune tulip: "Mimimimi…"

Ino white lily flower: "Lalalala…"

Tenten daisy: "Hahahahaha…"

Tsunade dandelion: "Poem poepoem poem poem…"

All Flowers:

"Little bread and butterflies kiss the tulips, and the sun is like a toy balloon.

There are get up in the morning glories, in the golden afternoon.

There are dizzy daffodils on the hillside, strings of violets are all in tune.

Tiger lilies love the dandy lions, in the golden afternoon, in the golden afternoon.

There are dog and caterpillars and copper centipede

Where the lazy daisies love the very peaceful life they lead…

You can learn a lot of things from the flowers, for especially in the month of June."

Temari fox-glove flower"

"There's a wealth of happiness and romance"

All Flowers:

"All in the golden afternoon, all in the golden afternoon, the golden afternoon…"

Naruto starts singing:

"You can learn a lot of things from the flowers, for especially in the month of June.

There's a wealth of happiness and romance…oh…"

Flowers:

"In the golden afternoon"

After the song ended, Naruto applaud for their wonderful performance. He couldn't believe that flowers could sing so well, especially ones that looked like his companions back home.

"So little boy, where exactly are you going anyways?" asked the Tsunade dandelion.

"Actually, I was following a white rabbit that looked like someone I know. I'm pretty sure he went that way but I lost him, so I gotta get searching, thanks, bye" said Naruto.

"That's all? How rude! For a little boy to come and listen to our song and not even stay a while to have a chat. I guess that's what you call...hmm…a freeloader, no not that. Well, whatever it is, you are just that, brat!" said one of the flowers.

"What did you say?!?!" argued Naruto

"Oh, you heard me." said the flower.

Naruto was getting madder and madder by the minute, but he had no time to waste on fighting these useless flowers. He ignored them and started to leave. Just then a flower used her roots and tripped Naruto. Naruto went tumbling down a small hill, which to him was big, and landed on a small puddle of water. Naruto got up, soaked and wet, and cursed under his breath. He walked off to dry himself and to stop himself from thinking about those no good, no mannered flowers. As he passed through some leaves and grass, he saw letters in the sky. They were all in a row, zigzag this way and zigzag that way. He followed the letters and ended up going through a bunch of grass and into a little small opening.

There in the opening sat a caterpillar on a mushroom with sunglasses on, smoking on his pipe. Naruto stared at him with interest, since he's never seen a caterpillar who actually smokes before or one that wore sunglasses.

"Shino?" Naruto said quietly under his breath.

But the caterpillar heard him. "Who's Shino?" asked the caterpillar.

"Uh…no one." chuckled Naruto.

"Hmm…who are you?" the caterpillar blew some smoke onto Naruto's face.

"What was that for?" coughed Naruto.

But the caterpillar didn't say anything and just asked him the same question. Naruto was starting to get irritated since the caterpillar didn't introduce itself.

"Well…who the hell are you then?" _"Stupid caterpillar"_ said Naruto as he thought at the same time.

"Just why exactly are you here anyways?" asked the caterpillar.

Naruto was about to answer when he couldn't remember what he was going to say. He had forgotten why he was there. _"Why the hell am I here?"_ thought Naruto. All he could remember was that he was chasing something; something he couldn't make out. That fall Naruto had earlier must've gotten to him. He then remembered why; he was chasing a perverted looking rabbit with boxers on.

"I remember!---" Naruto suddenly got cut off by the caterpillar.

"What is the problem that you are trying to solve?" asked the caterpillar.

"Well…first of all, I want to go back to my normal size. Being stuck like this sucks like hell, I feel like I'm a stupid bug trying to take shelter from water bombs!! And once I get outta this freaking tiny body, I'm going to find that---" once again the caterpillar interrupted him.

"STUPID BUG!?!?! I, SIR, AM A BUG!! AND I TAKE THAT QUITE OFFENSIVE!!!" yelled the caterpillar.

He started puffing and puffing and puffing and puffing until there was a cloud of smoke surrounding him to the point where Naruto couldn't see pass it. Naruto just stared and didn't know what to do.

"You IDIOT!!!! How do you think it feels for me!?!! I'm not a BUG like you!!! OI!! Listen when I'm talking to you, BAKA!!!" Naruto blew away the smoke to find that nothing was left but the pipe of smoke and a pair of sunglasses.

Naruto looked around for the stupid caterpillar but he couldn't find him. Then Naruto heard a voice coming from the air. He looked up to find none other then the caterpillar who had now turned into a butterfly with purple and pink wings. Naruto stared at the butterfly in awe and remembered that he used to wear sunglasses…since now the sunglasses came off, he can see what the caterpillar looks like. He looked up the caterpillar's wormlike body and aim for the face, but once his eyes reached the face, he had another pair of sunglasses on. _"Where the hell does he get all these sunglasses? Stupid bug!"_ thought Naruto.

"Oh, by the way, kid. One side of the mushroom will make you grow taller, and the other side will make you grow shorter." the caterpillar said as he flew away.

Naruto jumped onto the mushroom and looked down on it. One side will make him smaller and one side will make him bigger. But which one is which? Naruto ripped off a piece from the left and a piece from the right. He looked from his left to his right in confusion and started thinking of what to do. He hadn't had to think like this before. After a while, he gave up and just decided to bite into the one on his left. Nothing happened. Naruto thought it strange since something was supposed to happen. Just as Naruto started to stand up, his body grew so rapidly that he didn't even noticed until he was looking down on everything. Next thing he knew was that a small bird was flying around his face telling him to 'shoo!' Naruto got so annoyed by the bird that he whacked it with his enormous hand sending it to fly across the field. Just when the bird was coming back to give Naruto a piece of its mind, Naruto took a bite out of the mushroom in his right hand and sent him flying straight down. The bird flew straight across; realizing that it didn't hit anything, it looked down in anger and flew away.

Naruto sat up and looked up at what had happened. He had become the same size as he was earlier, so Naruto sat there and thought and thought and thought about what he should do with the two mushrooms he has. (Yes, Naruto is thinking). Then something struck him, and he decided to try out this new idea that came to mind. Naruto picked up the mushroom that was in his left hand and licked it. Suddenly he became the exact size he wanted, back to his normal size. He took the two mushrooms and put them in his pocket incase he needed it again.

Naruto walked and walked and walked until he came to a forest of trees full of signs all over them. Naruto looked and read all of them and wondered what he should do. They all didn't make sense whatsoever. Suddenly lights started flickering, scaring the daylights outta Naruto. He ran for cover only to find that there are no hiding places safe enough. So Naruto hid behind a giant tree, ducking his head in a sitting-on-a-toilet position.

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**-What lies ahead as our hero starts wimping out at the last minute?**

**-Note: All the song titles were made up; "All In The Golden Afternoon" is the actual song in the Disney movie; belongs to Disney Corp. ****Was too lazy to make up own song haha**

**-I know it's kinda boring now but I'll try to make it better…I suck with stories **

**Translation for the Japanese Words:**

**-Baka: Idiot**


	6. Chapter 6

**I hope you guys are enjoying this so far…I know I suck at this and it's been boring as hell, probably. Anyways, I thought I'd spice up this chapter, hopefully you'll all like it.**

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**Mad Hatter:** Sasuke

**March Hare:** Kiba

**Little Mouse:** Neji

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**Chapter 6 **

**(Contains yaoi)**

Naruto was hiding himself behind the ginormous tree when suddenly he heard a snickering sound. He started to freak out when suddenly he saw a pair of moon-shaped teeth smiling at him with no body or face. This shocked Naruto to the bone that he dashed out of the forest only go deeper into the forest. Just when Naruto thought he lost the smiling moon-shaped teeth, it reappeared right above him. Naruto gazed at the mouth, too freaked out to move, when suddenly eyes appeared. Then a body of a cat appeared. The cat was white with grey stripes. One of its eyes was red with a scar through it while the other eye was yellow. The cat suddenly had a mask over its mouth, but somehow, someway, the teeth were still visible. It started singing.

"You're a cat!" said Naruto.

"Why, yes, of course. A Cheshire cat that is. What else would I be?" asked the cat.

The cat then started disappearing on Naruto.

"Wait!" said Naruto. "Could you tell me which way I should go? There are so many signs that it's obvious if it was a trap."

"Well, if you want directions, there's no point in asking me."

"Then who should I ask?" asked the boy

"Well…you could try the Mad Hatter in that direction." said the cat pointing to the left.

"Mad Hatter? Mad?!?! I don't wanna go through mad people. They're probably emotionally, physically, mentally disturbed for all I know."

"Or you can ask the March Hare in that direction." pointing to the right.

"Well…at least that sounds a little better."

"Of course, he's mad too."

"What?!?! Aren't there anything sane people around here?!?!" yelled the blonde pulling on this hair.

The cat started humming a little tune and said to Naruto: "Well, there's no help in that. You see…mainly everyone here is mad."

The cat disappeared off into thin air leaving behind his teeth rocking back and forth until it disappeared.

Naruto brushed off the shaky feeling and decided to just go one way. Either way wouldn't matter since everyone was mad. Naruto walked and walked, but it seemed like the road was endless, going nowhere. He moved through enormous trees that had the weirdest types of leaves growing on it. Some looked like fishes while others looked like an uchiha. Some were circle shaped; some even had leaves that looked like a shark face of someone. Naruto was starting to wonder how he got into this mess. Suddenly he sees an opening with a long table filled with teapots and cups. He saw boy with a green hat and a green suit on sharing a drink of tea with a grey rabbit. They both were singing happily together.

Naruto moved in closer to see what the commotion was. As he walked through the entrance, his jacket got stuck on the gate. Naruto squirmed around and around to get his jacket loose from the door. It was no use, so he ripped that small part of his jacket off. As he flung him to go forward, he landed in a pair of muscular arms. Looking up, he sees Sasuke. _"Oh my God…It's Sasuke! No wait! Gotta remember that I'm not in the real world no more!"_ Naruto stared blankly at the Sasuke-look-alike as he looked back down at Naruto who was now blushing like a red tomato about to pop.

"And you are?" asked the Sasuke-look-alike.

"Na-Na-Naruto."

When Naruto's brain was done processing on what was going on, he pushed himself away from the Mad Hatter Sasuke-look-alike fella; cheeks still flashing red.

"Ooh? Looks like we have company."

Naruto looked over to the table to see the grey rabbit hopping over to them.

"Why don't you join us for a spot of tea?" asked the Mad Hatter Sasuke-look-alike.

"Uhh…s-sure." said Naruto.

Naruto follow the two similar weirdoes to the table.

"Help yourself, help yourself." said the March Kibare (pronounced like Key-Bare; Kiba + Hare).

Naruto sat down to the left of the Mad Hatter Sasuke-look-alike and across from the March Kibare. As Naruto grabbed his teapot and was about to pour out the tea, a small mouse with Neji eyes plopped out and looked at him sleepily. Naruto looked at it, with an eyebrow raised.

"What the hell? Why is there a RAT here? You guys should consider getting a cat for rat problems, man." said Naruto.

Upon hearing the word, "cat", the mouse shrieked, startled, and started running away in different directions, if possible. Both the March Kibare and Mad Hatter Sasuke-look-alike ran after the mouse as Naruto sat there watching the funny scene. The March Kibare tripped over a chair and landed splat on his face causing the Mad Hatter Sasuke-look-alike to crash into the rabbit sending him to fly pass the mouse whose been running away. The mouse stopped in its tracks and laughed its head off until the grey rabbit rose up angrily and grabbed the mouse by its tail. The mouse shrieked: "Save me! Save me!".

The Mad Hatter Sasuke-look-alike came back from where he landed with a teapot in his hands. The March Kibare then put the mouse back it. Both weirdoes looked over to Naruto with angry looks in their eyes. Naruto shuddered a little and started getting nervous.

"So…what should we do to him?"

Evil looks in the two weirdoes' eyes gave Naruto the hint that maybe he should start running away before it's too late. But before Naruto could move, the rabbit grabbed him by his legs pulling him back. Naruto, on the other hand, kept screaming: "NOOOO!!!! HELP ME!!! I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE!!!"

The Mad Hatter Sasuke-look-alike gave a signal to the rabbit to tell him to tie Naruto down to the table. The rabbit tied Naruto down on the table so that he made an 'X' with his entire body. Naruto was starting to freak out and had no idea what to do. _"I don't wanna die! I don't wanna die! I don't wanna die! I don't wanna die! I don't wanna die!"_ thought Naruto repeatedly, closing his eyes tightly. He felt someone remove his shoes, but didn't look cause he was too afraid. Naruto started giggling and laughing loudly when he couldn't stand the fact that someone was tickling his feet. He then felt someone unzipping his jacket zipper. He opened his eyes to find the Mad Hatter Sasuke-look-alike sitting over him.

"W-wa-wait! What are you going to do?!?!" screamed the blonde frantically.

"Don't worry, I'll be gentle." snickered the Sasuke-look-alike. "Besides, I kinda like you."

The Mad Hatter Sasuke-look-alike gave an evil smile his way. Naruto's eyes widened and if possible widened even more. Now all he could think about was: _"Oh God! Oh God! Forget about dying!! I don't wanna lose my virginity!!! Especially to a guy!!!! NOOO!!! I DON"T WANNA!!! I'M TOO YOUNG!!! MY VIRGINITY!!!! AHHHHH!!!! HELP MEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!"_ Sasuke-look-alike moved down on him like a snake slithering on the body of a sexy woman. His hands moved smoothly up Naruto's body causing his T-shirt to move up exposing his muscular body. Naruto whimpered and squirmed. He couldn't budge at all; the boy who was now on top of him was too strong to knock off. The boy in green lowered his head, sticking out his tongue which was now moving up Naruto's body. Naruto couldn't think straight and all he could do was moan in desperation and delight at the same time. Sasuke-look-alike moved his right hand and placed it on top of Naruto's chest. Slowly and gently, he slid his hand down Naruto's chest towards his bellybutton. He unbuttoned Naruto's pants button and started for the zipper.

"OI, OI!!! STOP IT!!!" screamed the blonde.

"What's wrong? Don't you want to experience where this can go?" snickered the boy.

"Uhh…n-no-not really…n-no."

"Don't worry, this won't hurt a bit. I'll show you how it feels to be touched where it will make you moan for mo---"

His words got cut off when a white rabbit hopped in yelling he was late. This brought a frown to his face but it relieved Naruto so much that he got the chance to knock off the boy who was on top of him. Sasuke-look-alike fell off Naruto and landed with a thud on the floor. The grey rabbit hopped up to the white rabbit and took his pocket watch; looked at it and started taking it apart.

"Well, I see why you're late. This watch is out of batteries and on top of that, it smells like perfume." said Kibare.

"Per-perfume?" asked the white rabbit, giving a nervous chuckle.

Kibare took a fork and started unscrewing everything inside. At this time, Naruto took his chance to untie the ropes that were attached to his hands and feet. He quickly snatched off the ropes and tuck his jacket back in, zipped it and went after the white rabbit. Sasuke-look-alike soon came to join Kibare who has now added a bunch of stuff onto the pocket watch. The white rabbit whimpered at the fact that his precious watch was being annihilated. The more they put stuff in, the more the watch started to go berserk. It began to puff outwards and suddenly, a loud bang was heard. The watch had exploded due to the fact that whatever those two weirdoes had stuffed in. The grey rabbit stared at the messed up watch and pushed it towards the sobbing white rabbit.

"Here you go. Outta batteries and swam in perfume, that was it."

"My preeeeccciiioouuusss…" said the white rabbit. "And it was an unbirthday present too!"

"Really?" teased the Sasuke-look-alike. "In that case…"

Both the Mad Hatter and the grey rabbit grabbed the white Jiraiya rabbit and tossed him out of the tea party. Naruto followed the flying rabbit with his eyes and ran for the gate. He turned around to see those two doing what they were doing the first time he saw them. _"This is stupid"_ thought Naruto and ran off after the white rabbit.

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**Translation for the Japanese words:**

**-Uchiha: Fan**

**-Yaoi: Gays or guys on guys...for those of you who don't know**


	7. Chapter 7

**ENJOY!!**

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**Chapter 7**

**(Random scene)**

When Naruto finally thought that he found the white rabbit, he disappeared on him again. Naruto decided to just walk on and see what he will find. Naruto walked into a dark forest which seemed to have no light passing through it whatsoever. Naruto looked around in concern and wondered where he was and where he was heading. Naruto started going in deeper and deeper and getting more lost. He felt hopeless; he felt as if he wouldn't be able to get out of the dark forest and get back to Konoha.

He started getting tired of walking around when all of a sudden he heard a very pleasant singing voice. Naruto looked around to find where the voice was coming from but no one was in sight since it was so dark. The heavenly voice he listened to made him drowsy. He started getting sleepier by the second and couldn't keep his eyes open. It was like the trance of jigglypuff or something. Before Naruto could do anything, he plopped to the ground and was soon sound asleep.

Now when Naruto slept, he REALLY slept. He was a VERY heavy sleeper and didn't budge at all when little creatures crawled on him. Something accidentally ran over him, but not on him; it shook him to the point where his whole body plopped over. Naruto just snored on as if he was on cloud nine.

_3 hours later…_ (with Simpson's theme)

Naruto woke up to the sound of a ghastly moaning; plus he had a nightmare, and here's how it went:

Naruto dreamt that he was walking down a path when suddenly he came upon a big old house. Not knowing that it was haunted, he walked up to the house hoping for shelter against the hard wind that blew down the path he wandered. He walked up to the door; was about to knock when suddenly the door slowly opened on its own. Naruto didn't know who did it, but whoever did it must've been a nice person to open the door without having him to knock it. Naruto peeked through the door to a dark room with only candles lit on the side of the walls. There was a large stairway in the middle of the room that spread left and right on the top. He slowly walked into the giant house and looked around nervously; hoping nothing would pop up in his face.

He looked to his right into a dark hallway to see a light all the way inside. He turned to go down the hallway; suddenly he felt something grab him from behind with claw-like hands! Naruto screamed like a sissy and when he was about to run away, the hand turned Naruto's body around and suddenly---

Naruto woke up.

Back to reality; Naruto actually did see a house after he woke up. It was pretty far away but he could make it out if he was to squint. Naruto walked towards the house to see if anyone was home so that he could ask them how the hell he could get out of this world he was now in. Naruto walked up the small stairs of the big old house towards the door. When he was about to knock, surprisingly enough, the door slowly opened on its own. Naruto, apparently, had forgotten about his nightmare. Naruto peeped into the house, looking around all over the place to see if there was anything suspicious.

"Hello???" said Naruto as his voice echoed throughout the house.

No answer. He walked into the house and looked around. No one seems to be home, but all the lights were on. Naruto decided to go explore the house. He walked up the stairs and to the right and up some more. He came to a hallway with a bunch of room doors. He opened the first one on his right and looked in. To his surprise he saw a skeleton hanging there with a rope around its neck. Naruto shrieked, popping out his white eyes. He quickly slammed the door shut and ran back downstairs screaming like a psycho maniac. He stopped at the bottom of the stairs when he noticed that the whole floor was gone. There was a huge hole in the middle of the room that seemed pitch black all the way down. Now Naruto was stuck on the stairs.

Since he had no where else to go, he went back up upstairs but this time to the left. The left side of the stairs was more bizarre than the right. He saw dolls flying around and dancing around in the hallway. And when I say dolls, I mean those freaky looking kinds with eyes staring at you. There were also stuffed animals floating around bumping into each other.

_"Ooook...this is weird"_ thought Naruto.

All of a sudden, one of the dolls flew rapidly towards Naruto into his face. Naruto stepped back as fast as he could but lost his footing and fell down the stairs. Naruto landed on his butt. He quickly opened his eyes to look up and see where the doll went but nothing was there. Also, when he looked down the middle flight of stairs, the giant black hole on the ground had disappeared. Naruto was now starting to get scared to death. If one more thing happens, he was bound to piss in his pants sooner or later.

He walked to the middle and looked down the stairs. Out of the blues, he feels a hand push him from behind, sending him to fly down yet another flight of stairs. As he tumbled down the stairs, he was able to get a glimpse of the floor and noticed that quicksand had now occupied the empty floor space. _"Shit! What the hell am I gonna do now? Crap! If I don't do something I'm going to fall into the quicksand!"_ Knowing this, Naruto focused some of his chakra onto his hands and feet and got a hold onto the stairs. This stopped him from plunging into the quicksand.

Naruto looked down to realize that the quicksand had a sinkhole in the middle that now was starting to swirl, making it into a bigger hole. Everything started to get suck into the hole; candles, doors, windows, lamps, rugs, tiles, and even Naruto started to get sucked in. He hung onto the rail of the stairs for as long as he could, but his hands started to slip off.

Each finger slipped off, pinky, ring finger, middle finger, thumb and then his pointer finger. Luckily, he had his other hand, but his other hand slipped off too, sending him down into the swirling hole with the rest of the furniture and home accessories.

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Naruto.

He was now sucked into the swirling hole in the quicksand and who knows what he will encounter next…

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**-Now that Naruto's got himself into this mess, how will he escape?**


	8. Chapter 8

**Don't own "The Simpsons" or "Homer" or the Halloween Special.**

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**Kyle:** Made-up character

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**Chapter 8**

**(Another random scene)**

THUD!!!

Naruto got up to find that he had fallen into some weird dimension. Naruto, who apparently fell into an ally, got up and walked out, looking around cautiously. He noticed that everything looked so weird, as if everything was 3D. Luckily, no one seemed to be in sight so far. He looked around to find stop signs and red lights. There were cars parked on the streets. There were stores that sold bakery and food. There were stores that sold clothing for people to wear. There were Italian, Chinese, American, Japanese, Mexican, and Vietnamese restaurants all over the place.

Naruto couldn't help but wonder where he was. He then saw people walking out of a restaurant, but the people didn't look like the "normal" people he knew. They all stared at Naruto as they walked past him, trying not to make eye contact. They looked him up and down and quickly walked away. Suddenly more people appeared and looked at him as they pass. Naruto felt so uncomfortable that he could pop any minute.

But there was someone who was actually nice enough to approach Naruto. A boy around the same age as Naruto walked up to him and said: "I know who you are, you're Uzumaki Naruto, aren't you?"

Naruto blinked at him.

"How'd you know?" asked the curious Naruto.

"Well, you see. Umm …in our world…I don't want to be rude…but in our world, you are considered not real. You are an anime character from the anime "Naruto". I bet if we were to fall into your world, you would think the same thing about us; that we are not real, and that you are. Do you get what I'm trying to say?" asked the boy nervously.

"Uhh…not really. Kinda, I'm not sure. Where am I anyways?" said Naruto

"Well, this is America. Here, come with me, I'll try to show you some idea of what I'm trying to say to you."

Naruto followed the little boy down the street and turned right onto another street. They crossed the street where the stop intersections were. As they walked across the street, Naruto noticed that people in the car were looking at him.

"Don't worry, we are not allowed to do anything rash in this country or we will get arrested." said the boy. "It's very different from Konoha, so umm…if you don't mind, Naruto, could you try not to make a scene? I don't want you to get in trouble."

"Ah…sure"

After they turned a couple of more times, they came to a house, not so big and not so small. They walked up to the house and the boy opened the door to the house. They walked in. Naruto looked around and found that the house was very pretty. It was clean and everything was so organized. There was a living room to the left and straight down the hall was the kitchen. To their left was a study room and there was a stair way that led upstairs to where all the rooms were.

Naruto followed the boy upstairs and into his room. Once he walked in, he saw a bunch of posters all over the wall. And to his surprise, they all had him in it; well, most of them. He couldn't believe what he was seeing; there was a picture of him with Sasuke. There was a picture of Kakashi in his Anbu outfit with all his dogs. There were many more and it's hard to believe that this is all happening.

"You see what I mean when I say that you are not real in this world?" asked the boy. "By the way, my name is Kyle. It's nice to meet you."

"I'm Naruto, but then again, you already know that. So we are like stuff that you guys like?" asked Naruto.

"I guess you can say that. Guess who I like best?" said the boy smiling widely.

"Uhh…I don't know."

"SASUKE!!!" yelled Kyle.

Naruto was so shocked and irritated at the same time that he bulged out his white eyes.

_"Why the hell does this foo like Sasuke? I'm better than that bastard. What does he have that I don't have?"_ thought Naruto.

"Oh! Don't feel offended Naruto, I like you too! You're funny!" said Kyle.

_"Funny? What the fuck is that supposed to mean, punk?!?!"_

"Anyways, you can stay here for a while if you'd like, my mom wouldn't mind."

"That's ok." said Naruto. I gotta get going anyways. I gotta get home."

"Oh, ok." said the disappointed boy.

"Nice meetin' ya, Kyle."

Naruto walked downstairs and showed himself out of the house. Naruto walked out onto the sidewalk and back the way he came. But since Naruto was so bad at directions, he went the wrong way and ended up bumping into someone familiar.

_An hour ago…_

At the same time that Naruto going to Kyle's house, Homer Simpson had came into the same dimension due to the fact that he went through a mysterious wall behind his bookcase. (This is from one of the Simpsons Halloween Specials). Now Naruto knows he had seen that face somewhere before but for some reason he couldn't remember. Homer walked up to Naruto and looked at him. As he looked at Naruto, Naruto looked back at him.

"What are you staring at?" said Homer.

"I should be asking you that, fatty!" yelled back Naruto.

They went at it for about another five minutes. Naruto couldn't stand it anymore and wanted to punch him so bad, but he remembered what Kyle had told him. Before Naruto could do anything, Homer decided to give him a piece of his own mind. Homer was about to punch Naruto when Naruto caught his hand. He pushed Homer back and Homer fell over.

"Why you little?!?!?!" screamed Homer in his enraged form and charged at Naruto.

Naruto moved out of the way to let Homer crash into a mailbox.

"Why you little?!?!" Homer screamed again, shaking his fist.

Suddenly a cop's car drove by, and they pretended as though nothing had happened. The cops looked at them with suspicion and drove off. Naruto just walked off somewhere, at least away from Homer. Naruto walked and came to a place which seemed like a park. He was so tired of all the bickering that he went to go lie down on the grass beside a big tree. Homer followed him.

"Hey, uhh…I was wondering how the hell did you get here?" asked Homer.

"Huh? Oh…I don't know. I fell in some whirlpool thing." said Naruto, lying on the grass with his hands folded up behind his head.

"That's strange; I went through the same exact thing." said Homer.

"Eh, I'm going to sleep."

"Oooh…sleeeeeeeep. I'll join!" said Homer, who now lied down beside Naruto and quickly fell asleep.

As they lied there, Naruto couldn't help but keep waking up to Homer's loud snores. Naruto opened his eyes to see Homer snoring with his mouth open and drool dripping out. This sent a chill down Naruto's spine. Naruto jumped up the tree and decided to sleep up in the tree instead. After about 10 minutes, Naruto was sound asleep.

About what seemed like one minute later, he heard screeching. This woke him up right away, and to his surprise, he was back in the same dark forest he had been wondering in in wonderland.

_"What the hell? I was dreaming this whole time? It felt so real."_ thought Naruto.

Naruto was about take a step forward when he noticed something floating behind him.

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**-What could this "something" be?**


	9. Chapter 9

**Hope you guys are liking it! I'm almost done! YAY!!**

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**The Queen of Hearts:** Hinata

**Short King:** Akamaru

**Ace Card:** Itachi

**Card 2:** Deidara

**Card 3:** Kisame

**Other Cards:** Akatsuki Members, Gaara, Kankurou, Sai, Chouji, Asuma, Kabuto, Orochimaru, Haku, Zabuza, & other guys I didn't mention

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**Chapter 9**

Naruto turned around to see a pair of floating banana-moon-shaped teeth.

"IT'S YOU!!!" yelled Naruto, pointing at the familiar teeth.

Right then, the Cheshire cat appeared before him, smiling like a clown.

"Lost?" asked the cat.

"Well…kinda." said the blonde. "I'm trying to find my way outta here, but it seems no matter where I go, I always end up in some place weird."

"Can't help you there. You see, everything here is ALWAYS done the QUEEN'S way."

"Queen???" repeated the blonde. "Haven't met one, and I don't plan on meeting her."

"Oh? Are you sure? She'd be dying to meet you." a snicker came from the cat.

"Is there any other way?"

"Tell you what, since you're so desperate to get outta here, I'll show you a shortcut to her." said the cat.

The Cheshire cat pulled on a lever on the tree and a trapdoor opened up. It was bright on the other end of the trapdoor. Naruto walked through it to find himself in a labyrinth of bushes. Naruto turned this way and that way, trying to find his way out of the maze. As he got closer to a certain area, he heard singing. He heard people singing, but he didn't see people at all. They were no where to be found. As Naruto ran up and down the maze, a splash of blue paint suddenly landed on his head.

_"What the hell??"_ thought Naruto.

He noticed that it came from over the maze on the other side. Since the labyrinth was taller than he was, he jumped up to notice three cards-like men in pajamas painting white roses in the rose bed. Now when talking about pajamas, I mean they were in their boxers. One of them had fishies on his boxers with the symbol of a spades on his chest (AKA card #3); one had weird figurines on his boxers like spiders and weird looking birds with a diamond on his chest (AKA card #2); and the last one had teddy bears and duckies on his boxers with a heart on his chest (AKA ace card). All of them had their nails painted purple. All three also had straw hats on. Naruto walked around to find an opening to where the three were.

He walked up to them, and it seemed as though they didn't notice him at all. They just went on painting the roses blue talking to each other.

"Umm…" said Naruto.

Suddenly they all turned around to look at Naruto who was looking back at them like 'what the hell are you looking at?'

"Umm…what are you guys doing??"

"Well, you see…we're painting the roses blue. The Queen, you see, she likes em' blue." said the card #3.

"Soo desu ka? Then I'll help!" said the blonde

"OK!" said ace card, giving Naruto the peace sign.

Naruto grabbed a paint brush and started painting the white roses blue.

As they sang their way along, painting the roses blue, a sudden trumpet was heard in the distant. Naruto noticed that it was the white Jiraiya rabbit. All three cards started shaking crazily and biting their fingernails. Naruto looked at them and wondered what was wrong.

"What's wrong, guys?" asked Naruto

"T-th-th-the Q-q-qu-queen!!!" all three screamed together.

The three cards started running around in circles shouting and squirming and spouting out nonsense about what to do with the roses and the fact that the queen was coming. All three cards bumped into each and landed on the floor, pretending to hide there as if they were invisible. Naruto didn't know what to do, so he just sat down to the side of the cards.

Cards from all over the place flew this way and that to welcome the queen into the rose garden. They did their little entrance dance as Naruto watched. "_….booooorrriiinnnggg" _thought Naruto. They all made a little walkway for the queen to walk through. The queen entered in on an ancient time chariot with 4 cards carrying each end. Out in the front was a small dog walking, all dressed up with a crown on its head.

The cards placed the chariot onto the floor. As the queen opened her curtains to make her way out, Naruto noticed that her hand was so smooth and soft and beautiful. She opened the last of the curtains and pushed herself out of the chariot. To Naruto's surprise, she was very beautiful with beads in her hair, which had bangs that stopped perfectly right above her eyebrows. She was in a long, blue, summer-time kimono. She had a closed fan in her left hand, and wore three different kinds of bracelets. She had the most beautiful amulet necklace on which was made of sapphire.

Naruto just kept staring at her. He couldn't take his eyes off her. Her beautiful dress, her beautiful hands, her beautiful face and her beautiful eyes. They were lavender-ish and had such serenity in them. As she was about to look up in his direction, the dog, appeared right in front of Naruto's face and starting barking like crazy.

"What the hell!?!?!" yelled Naruto.

But the dog kept barking at him. Next thing Naruto knew, the Queen was in front of him smiling as she pick up the dog.

"I'm sorry; the King tends to bark at trespassers a lot. And who might you be?"

"_The King??_" Naruto was so stunned by her beauty that he was speechless. He kept staring at her. Her face began to turn as red as a tomato since she couldn't stand the fact that he kept looking directly at her.

The three cards who were supposedly hiding from her finally got her attention. She turned to see the three of them lying there with their hands covering their heads. Before she realized why they were hiding there, she noticed that her roses had been painted BLUE!!!

"Dooshite?? Why did you paint them blue? I liked it the way it was." She looked at them with a painful expression on her face.

"It wasn't me!" cried the ace card. "Card 2 made me do it!! Please don't kill me!!" It was hard to not notice the snot dripping down his nose.

"Me!?!?! It was Card 3! He kept saying that you like blue, my Queen!! And he brought up the idea!! Please don't hurt me!!"

"WHAT?!?!?! It was NOT me!!! Ace told us that it was a good opportunity to brighten up your day by painting them blue! I didn't want to do it! I was forced to!! They were gonna make me eat paint!!" said Card 3 crying at the same time. "Please…be gentle." shielding himself.

The ace card was about to argue back when the Queen spoke.

"Look, I don't mind that you're doing this for me. It's very sweet. But next time, just let me know, ok?"

Since the cards were rookies, they heard nothing but bad things about the Queen who usually chop their heads off for doing something stupid and not of her liking. But they were wrong.

"Three months in the dungeon." said the Queen.

All three cards went numb. Guess they were right. Several other cards came and took them away.

"Now…where were we?" said the Queen looking over to Naruto.

Naruto gave a big gulp and began to reply when she interrupted him.

"Oh, do you know how to cook? Let's go make something."

Naruto looked at her and thought, "_Oh, great…I can't cook for jack shit. I hope she doesn't throw ME in the dungeon just because I don't know how to cook._" They were brought into the royal kitchen, and all the ingredients were brought to them by the servants.

Naruto had NO CLUE what to do, while the Queen just went on her merry way as if she already knew what to make. Little did Naruto know, the Queen was already starting to like him, and not in an infatuation kinda way.

She began to mix her ingredients in a big bowl. Naruto stood there staring at the things provided for him on the table. He had no idea how to start or what to make until something hit his head. Of course, that's what he could make. They both busily went about making their food and who knows what will be brought about from their cooking.

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**-Well, what will Naruto make? And will the Queen's emotions intensify for Naruto as they grow closer?**

**Translation for the Japanese words:**

**-Soo desu ka: Is that so?; Really?**

**-Dooshite: Why?**


	10. Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!! AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

THERES ONE MORE CHAPTER TO GO!! SO HANG TIGHT! PLEASE R&R!! THANKS FOR READING!

I HOPE YOU GUYS HAVE A SAFE AND WONDERFUL HOLIDAY!!!


	11. Chapter 10

**Here you go everyone!! A New Year's present!! Enjoy the last chapter!! I hope you all enjoyed it...even though I was a crappy writer...don't forget to R&R!! Thanks!! and Good Luck to everyone this New year!!!**

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**Chapter 10 **

The Queen and Naruto concentrated on what they were going to make. The Queen, of course, before she started, had already changed into something that wouldn't dirty her outfit. Naruto, on the other hand, was getting flour all over his suit. Every once in a while the Queen would look over to Naruto and smile, but being who Naruto is, he didn't notice at all and went on making his food.

About 2 and a half hour later, they had perfected their dish. Naruto showed the Queen his "lovely" dish. The Queen looked at it and said: "Oh, my, how…nice. It's…ramen."

"Do you like it?" asked Naruto.

"Yes, of course." said the Queen with a nervous chuckle.

"What did you make?" asked the blonde.

"Well…I made…." She showed him what she had accomplished.

Naruto looked at it, and it turned out to be a giant rectangular cake with two boys kissing each other on the face of the cake. Naruto thought it was weird and didn't realize that one of the boys was him until he saw the orange jumpsuit that was on the cake. It was him kissing SASUKE!!! Naruto's face went blank and a sudden urge to throw up starting acting up.

"What's wrong?" asked the Queen.

"It's….n-nothing. I-I-I-…bllaaaahhhhh ."

Naruto had thrown up all over the kitchen floor and some of the puke splashed on her dress. She gave a small scream and the servants and guards came running into the kitchen. Since they seemed to be ok, the servants and guards let them be.

Naruto apologized for throwing up on her and said that it wouldn't happen again. Since they've been cooking for about almost 3 hours, they decided to try the food they made. Of course they ate the ramen first.

"Mmmm….oishii!" said the Queen.

"Desu ne?" said Naruto, giving a wide smile.

After they gulped down the ramen, they went for the cake. The Queen picked up a knife and walked towards Naruto. Naruto didn't realize that the knife was for the cake and freaked out, looking at the knife with white bulgy eyes.

"I-I'm s-sorry. D-did I do something wrong? Please….I-I…."

"Huh? Oh? I'm sorry…would you like to cut the cake with me?"

Naruto looked at her dumbfoundedly. "_Of course, the knife is for the cake. Boy, I gotta stop being so paranoid._"

"Sure."

Naruto got up out of his seat and made his way around to the Queen. When he was standing right next to her, she started for the cake, but suddenly she used her finger to wipe some of the cream onto Naruto's face. The Queen started giggling and Naruto just stood there like he didn't know what had just happened. When he realized, he did the same thing back to her. They both screamed and laughed and went at it for about 3 minutes. Naruto found a can of whip cream and started squirting it straight at her. She screamed and shielded herself with her arms. Luckily for her, she found some dough left in the giant bowl she was using and threw some at Naruto like snowballs.

They both went about it for another 10 minutes or so, all the while the King trying to dodge their clumsy feet. Spinning around the small counter in the middle, Naruto made a dash for the Queen to grab her by her waist but she threw the rest of the dough and the bowl towards Naruto, which landed on his head. Now Naruto couldn't see where he was going. She moved away from him a little to the right, laughing her butt off. When Naruto removed the bowl off his head, he didn't realize a giant pot hanging in front of him and ran right into it, causing him to land on the Queen, who then fell to the floor with Naruto now on top of her. She let out a loud scream and all the servants and guards came running into the kitchen…again.

"My Queen, are you alright? What did this perverted bastard do to you?" asked one of the cards.

The King started growling and barking at Naruto for what he did.

Naruto finally regained consciousness and looked up to see a room full of cards ready to take him away.

"Chotto matte kudasai. It's not Naruto's fault. I-I…I mean…."

"My Queen, this is unacceptable, so he must be put away for good. AFTER HIM!!!"

"_Oh crap!_"

Naruto got off the Queen and made a dash for the kitchen door as fast as he could and ran out. The cards followed him out including the King. The Queen looked on, and suddenly it occurred to her that she must go after them. She didn't want him to be locked away. She just wanted to spend time with him. She just wanted to have fun with him. What was she going to do now?

As she ran out the kitchen door, instead of finding the angry mob after Naruto, she found her humble servants surrounding her, asking if she was alright. She couldn't get pass them for there was about 10 of them trying to tend to her.

Outside in the rose garden, the cards chased Naruto.

"LOOK!! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!!!" shouted Naruto at the cards.

But they just kept chasing after him. Soon enough, the King was in front of the crowd, chasing and barking at Naruto. As they ran and ran, Naruto went through the maze but found himself trapped and cornered. Naruto jumped up and started running along the top of the bushes and headed straight for the trap door he came in from. As he was about to reach it, he realized that he was running in the forest towards the Mad Hatter Sasuke-look-alike and the grey March Kibare.

Next thing Naruto knew, they were grabbing onto him, telling him to drink some tea with them. Naruto fell into a pile of large sugar and tea was poured all over him. When Naruto came to, he was in the ocean swimming, trying to get out. He continued on swimming and ended up in a small bottle which poured him out onto some checkered floor. Naruto noticed that the Shikamaru door was right in front of him. He made his way for the door, while the cards, now joined by everyone else Naruto had met, was still chasing after him.

Naruto turned the knob of the Shikamaru door and he said "Ouch!"

"You again…oi…mendokuse. Still locked you know?"

"Hurry! Open up!!! I gotta get outta here or I'm never gonna be able to get out!"

"What are you talking about, doofus? You ARE outside."

"Huh?? What the hell are you talking about??"

The door opened his mouth to exposed Naruto sleeping outside in the real world.

"Ah, crud!" said Naruto.

Naruto tried to widen the door's mouth like last time, but this time the door was prepared. Now Naruto was desperate. He started yelling to himself, telling himself to wake up. The angry mob came closer and closer until everything became a blur and suddenly…

"Naruto…Naruto….Naruto…oi, Naruto! Okite!"

Naruto woke up squirming to find Sakura, Shikamaru, Hinata, and Kiba looking at him.

"Dooshita no, Naruto-kun?" asked Hinata.

"Ha! He probably got a nightmare!" growled Kiba. Akamaru gave a small bark in agreement.

Naruto looked up blankly and then widened his eyes.

"Guys, I had the most weirdest dream ever!"

"Oi, Naruto, forget it. If we're late, Tsunade-sama's going to kill us. Hayaku!!" said Sakura.

"Mendokuse." mumbled Shikamaru.

The others started walking off and Naruto got up to follow them and tell his story.

"But it's true, the dream I had had everyone in it, even that bastard Sasuke!"

"Whatever Naruto!" said Sakura.

"But you gotta believe me. Shino was a caterpillar and he turned into a butterfly and you were a rose and Shikamaru was a door…"

"What was I?" asked Kiba.

"Huh? Oh, you were a rabbit."

"What?!?! A rabbit?? HA! Some imagination you have."

"But it's true……."

As Naruto's words drifted off, only one person smiled the whole way through, thinking about how wonderful his story was…

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**-Hope you all liked it!!**

**Translation for the Japanese words: **

**-Oishii: Delicious**

**-Desu ne?: Isn't it? **

**-Chotto matte kudasai: Please wait**

**-Mendokuse: Troublesome**

**-Okite: Wake up**

**-Dooshita no: What's wrong?**

**-Hayaku: Hurry up**


End file.
